TEXAN PATENTS ENGINE THAT RUNS ON BLOOD

A part-time engineer from Brownwood, Texas has successfully filed a patent for an automobile adaptor that converts human blood into fuel.    

The device can be attached to existing petrol vehicles, modifying them to run on the readily available and semi-renewable fuel source.

Travis Renner, a car mechanic by day, worked alone on the project for ten and a half years after originally being inspired by the ongoing war in Iraq.

Renner said “We’ve known for a long time that oil reserves are down and hell if that didn’t get me thinking, well what do we got a lot of? 

“Blood”

“It’s logical. You got the blood everywhere, in the streets, on the news. My device is a sure fire investment for one hella bloody future”.

Lobbyist groups like the American Consumer Group slammed the device for being inhumane and messy.

A spokesperson said “The concept of spilling honest American blood just to power our transport industry is barbaric and is unpatriotic.

“Can you imagine living in a world where driving to Walmart is more highly valued than the sanctity of human life?”

The car adaptor is not yet available on the market, but a number of big name oil and motor companies are reportedly interested in Renner’s whereabouts.